Ghosting Your Therapist: Why It Happens and What to Know

Written By Bright Archibald

Ghosting isn’t just something that happens while dating, it happens in therapy, too. You might cancel a session and never reschedule. You stop replying to emails. You disappear.

If you’ve ever thought about ghosting your therapist (or have already done it), you’re not alone. It’s more common than most people realize. But while it might feel easier in the moment, ghosting can leave important work unfinished and create more confusion than closure.

Here’s why people ghost their therapists, what it means, and what to consider before cutting off contact.

Why Do People Ghost Their Therapist?

1. Avoiding an uncomfortable conversation

Many people don’t know how to say, “This isn’t working for me.” It can feel awkward, even rude. So instead of risking confrontation, they disappear. It feels easier but it skips the chance for a real conversation.

2. Therapy got too real

Good therapy often gets uncomfortable. You might hit a nerve or start talking about things you’ve spent years avoiding. It’s natural to want to pull back. But that discomfort is often a sign that meaningful progress is around the corner.

3. Life got busy

Sometimes ghosting isn’t personal, it’s circumstantial. Life gets chaotic. Schedules fill up. You forget to respond. One missed session becomes three, and suddenly it feels weird to reach back out.

4. The therapist didn’t feel like the right fit

Not every therapist is the right match. If you didn’t feel heard, understood, or comfortable opening up, it makes sense to want to leave. But disappearing skips the part where you could find someone who does fit better.

5. You feel shame or guilt

Maybe you haven’t followed through on goals. Maybe you missed a few sessions. It’s easy to feel like you’ve “failed” therapy. But therapists don’t expect perfection they expect honesty. And they won’t judge you for falling off track.

What Happens When You Ghost?

Therapists understand that people come and go. They won’t be angry or take it personally. But they will care.

Therapy is a relationship, and when one person suddenly disappears, there’s no closure. Your therapist might worry you’re struggling. They might wonder if you felt safe. And for you, ghosting can mean leaving important work unfinished and avoiding a pattern worth exploring.

If You’re Thinking About Ghosting

Before you vanish, consider this:

  • Say what’s not working. You’re allowed to be direct. Your therapist can’t help adjust the process if they don’t know what’s wrong.

  • Talk about the hard parts. Therapy gets uncomfortable, but that’s often where growth happens. You don’t have to go through it alone.

  • Ask for changes. You might need a different approach, a slower pace, or even a referral to another therapist. That’s all valid.

And if you still decide to stop, that’s okay too. But doing it with communication can help you feel more in control and less like you’re running from something.

Final Thoughts

Ghosting your therapist doesn’t make you a bad client. It just means something wasn’t working and maybe you didn’t know how to say it.

But therapy is one of the few spaces where you can say what’s hard to say. So if you’re thinking about leaving, say that. If you’re unsure how to move forward, bring it up.

You deserve support that fits. And your therapist wants you to get the help you need even if it’s not with them.

Thinking about therapy, or returning after a break?

We’re here to help no pressure, no judgment. Contact us to talk about next steps.

References:

Bright Archibald
Next

Understanding Trauma Dumping: Signs, Impact, and Healthier Alternatives